In terms of resources to learn or grasp the specific configurations in your chart. I'd suggest studying Jeffrey Wolf Green astrology. Either through the DVD correspondence course which will take you through the whole teaching, or through other teachers who are offering courses. A personal reading or tutoring session where you can address these specific questions on your chart in a more solid container might be helpful too.
I'll offer some guidelines for your question on the sesquiquadrate:
with my Saturn full sesquiquadrate NN ...I'll be 'forced' in this life to do Saturn in a way that truly makes me fit in with the consensus (which probably speaks to this "world on my shoulders" feeling I've had since I was born and rejection of my instinctual expression due to not fitting in)
Without looking at your chart, I'll offer a general perspective for approaching this aspect. Remember that all aspects to the NN speak to how the soul will be integrating and working towards the evolutionary direction of the NN. Saturn is how we each condition our reality and become self-responsible for our own choices/long term conditioning in this life according to our soul's evolutionary needs.
Saturn in relationship to the NN will of course point directly to the necessary work, limitations, discipline, conditioning etc. that is relevant to our ongoing evolutionary purpose.
So in applying Saturn to the NN via the full phase sesquiquadrate we'd consider what is the meaning of the full phase sesquiquadrate and of course look at the signs/houses and rulers of the signatures involved. Here's a quote I found from an old thread on aspects, from a lecture JWG gave:
The disseminating phase correlates to the totality of the sociological cultural system in which you find yourself. In our time, everything that America is correlates to the disseminating phase. All possible lifestyles, beliefs, values and all that which if impossible - disseminating phase. It is the highest degree of socialization, the absolute need to disseminate your purpose which was initiated all the way back at the new phase conjunction. Not just amongst friends and close relationship, but in a full blown integration within the world - job or career.
When you pass the inconjunct, you become aware of what you are and what you can do and you go out and do it. The problem is that the sesquisquare is the last initiation, the last social ritual, social rite toward that goal. You have realized the you are meant to be a stockbroker and you have a powerful vision of wanting to be a stockbroker. In this aspect, you have a powerful vision of how to do it in a unique way, in a way that will actually change the social system that you are about to participate in, now being the world of a stockbroker. At the full phase sesquisquare, until you learn the ways and the means of the stock brokering world, all their little happy rituals, all the things that they do, the consensus of the stockbroker world. Until you learn that, you will be rejected in the sesquisquare full phase. You will be perceived as willful and as threatening to the established status quo. The security is now found through consensus and disseminating phase. The challenge is to acknowledge how that system is working, how the consensus is working, not in the way of becoming it, but in a way of making it work for you. That is the enlightened approach. The problem in most cases is the becoming - that is the easier path. It creates and leads to less social and individual stress, does it not? That's the voice that says, "If you can't beat them, join them." The challenge is to join them without them knowing that you haven't really joined. After all, if things are left in the consensus state forever, it is just going to crystallize and die off. We have to have new blood. That is what this aspect is for, new input, new visions. The key word for disseminating phase is just that - to disseminate, to share, to give.
See the whole thread. I think the first page is probably the most helpful: https://forum.schoolofevolutionaryastrology.com/index.php/topic,360.0.html